celeryandhummus:

our kids will probably attend a middle school dance where the theme is the 2010’s

they’ll wear leggings with ugg boots and twerk to “call me maybe”

rampaigehalseyface:

blimpcat:

i was listening to this song when i came across this gif on my dash and im giggling at how well it’s fitting with it help skdjfksdfsg

I keep expecting it to fall out of sync and yet…

monstergirlsinc:

itsanearhatloki:

noticemeimbroken:

katonwolf:

ximjustinlovex:

sleeping-with-theveil:

allyykatt:

 

I’m a lesbian so i must have a crush on every girl i see.

I have a lot of guy friends so i must be fucking every single one of them.

I smile a lot, so i must have the perfect life.

I listen to reggae, so I must be a stoner.

My opinion matters, so I must be a bitch.

I’m comfortable with my body, so I get around?

I’m friends with a lot of guys, so I’ve must have hooked up with all of them.

I like to help out, so I must be a suck up.

I’m black, so I must be ghetto.

I’m black, so I must be stupid.

I’m Mexican, so I must be low class.

I’m bisexual, so I must get around.

I’m straight up blunt, so I must be a bitch.

I like to drink, so I must be an alcoholic.

I don’t hang out with guys, so I must be a lesbian.

I cut myself so I must be emo.

I’m bisexual, so none of my girl friends can feel safe.

I laugh and smile, so I cannot be depressed.

I like spending my day at home, so I don’t have any friends

I am gay, so i must be bullied

I am trans, so I must be a freak.

Most of my friends are dudes, so I must be a tomboy.

I’m on Tumblr, so I must have zero friends in real life

I’m a Muslim, so I must be a terrorist

I make a lot of mistakes so I must be stupid/retarded.

I strongly defend LGBT so I must be gay.

I’m from a broken family, so I must be a rebel.

I like rasta colors, so I must smoke weed.

I’ve had sex, so I must be a slut.

I’ve made mistakes, so I must be untrustworthy.

I really love him, so I must hold on.

I’m a Filipino, so I must be a maid.

I really love him, so I must be taken for granted.

I’m a Politician, so I must be corrupt.

I’m Blonde, so I must be really stupid.

I’m wearing a black shirt, so I must be emo.

I wear make up, so I must be a flirt.

I make alot of mistakes, so I must be hated.

I am a teenager, so I must be misunderstood.

“Forever reblogg”.

Wow this

this is perfect wow

I’m a Christian, so I must hate gays

I have big boobs, so I must dress like a whore

I’m overweight, so I must be fat

I’m not a big talker, so I must have no friends

I’m homeschooled, so I must be a loner

I like country music, so I must be a redneck

I like pop music, so I must be a floozy

I’m Black so I must like watermelon, kool aid, and fried chicken

I’m Mexican so I must hang out at home depot

I’m Irish so I must be drunk

I’m German so I must be hitler

I love this.

I’m an atheist so I must be a pretentious asshole.

I’m a masculine girl so I must be a lesbian.

I’m a feminine boy so I must be gay.

I’m a man so I must be a sexist rapist.

I’m Caucasian so I must have the easy life.

I like electronic music so I must like tripping acid.

the-absolute-funniest-posts:

kankristhighhighs:

In art class my friend rolled himself in bubble wrap and stayed like that the whole day. When he sat down in our math class the teacher told him to take it off and he didn’t want to so he said “long live the king” and rolled out the door and down the hallway. And all you could hear was the faint popping of the bubblewrap as he rolled away. My teacher never went after him. 

mostgay:

I have a tab open of a picture of Harriett Tubman that I switch to whenever my parents walk in and think I’m doing homework.

I think I’ve been doing it since fifth grade idk why they haven’t caught on I just stare intently at the picture until they leave. 

saddyke:

mormondad:

commanderinqueef:

I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING 

spaghetti spaghetti but he keeps on forgetting spaghetti 

Sometimes I just need to Bring this back

staff:

magsby:

petition for tumblr staff to leave

we don’t want to be here anyway

david karp holds us hostage

send help

fartgallery:

silver-the-little-monster:

fartgallery:

just bought a bunch of condoms cause i am plan to do a lot of the sex 2nite!

Those are balloons.

I couldn’t decide on one response so here are a bunch of them:

• talk about a blow job
• im going to have to inflate first
• hopefully I dont burst early
• the balloon wont be the only thing kept off the ground
• theres a party in my pants
• i might have to pump it a little first
• im gonna have pop-pop
• haha yeah

makebelievesandcelluloids:

me bottoming for the first time

princekarkat:

for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch

laufeystarks:

when you see someone attractive and you just

luminousrogue:

This is officially my favorite website ever.